My choices and the opportunities that come from them

I have made my fair share of "mistakes." The reason I put mistakes in quotes is because I really feel that nothing is really a mistake. You make choices and the result of those choices are what creates your personality and your attitude. The choices that result in a not so pleasant outcomes, are simply a way for each of us to learn and grow from that experience. Mistakes are very rarely made, and no matter how terrible the mistake is, there is always a way to spin it into a positive opportunity.

I made the choice shortly after high school to perform acts that were inappropriate for my age and maturity level. I was in over my head and I didn't even know it. Those choices led me to become a mother. Who would have known that my life passion was to be a parent and care for my children!?!? I sure would not have expected it, since kids had never really been my favorite thing. Had I not made this choice that everyone thought was so terrible, I would have wasted several more years of my life being selfish and just plain stupid. Having children is such a huge responsibility and it is very difficult, but I adapted quickly and grew up very quickly. Not that I have to explain that too far, because everyone who knows me can see the huge leaps I have taken in the past few years. I am now married with two children and cannot wait to have another one or two. My husband and I timed our second child perfectly for OUR life plan, even though people believed he was another accident because we had not married yet. But he was definitely planned and came at the perfect time in our life. My husband works full time and supports us financially and then some. I also work and contribute a small amount to our monthly budget. We are both in college and care for ourselves completely. We do not ask for donations, we do not expect others to provide for us, and we definitely do not live off of the government or anyone else. 

As two grown adults, my husband and I are making the choice to have more children. We still live in an apartment but are saving money quickly and plan to buy a home this summer. We are great parents and spend real, quality time with our children. We love one another and love our little family more than anything. We have a small apartment. We have financial debts. We have "for the time being" jobs. We have a messy house sometimes. We have a really crappy car (but also one really awesome SUV!). But we have a plan and we have the means to see that plan through. We agree with each other on most things and respect each other when we do not. My husband and I have both come a very, very long way in the past few years individually AND as a couple. And we deserve all of these things we are working hard for. Some things are still in the works, but how is it anyone else's place to say if we are or are not ready for more children? We are doing things in a non-traditional way, but we are definitely not doing things in a way that could be harmful to our children. We are being safe and smart and have weighed out all pros and cons to every decision we have made thus far. Our duty to our family is to make decisions that will most benefit us as a unit. For our extended family and friends, it is their job to trust us with our own lives and support us in the choices we are making. Not to criticize or tell us we are doing things wrong, simply because we are doing things differently.

And for these choices, know that regardless of the outcome, we will spin it to create the most positive opportunity possible. Maybe it is not a good idea for us to have another child right this moment because of living situations, or because we are still in school, or because we don't have our dream careers yet. But no two people have the same idea of what the perfect plan is, so how can anyone judge what we feel is best? I am beyond excited to say that I will be a young, active, fun mother to all of my children. For me and my husband, having children early is what is working really well! We love it and will make our choices on our own. If people disagree and truly get upset about it, then that is a choice they are making. Those people will have to live with that negativity in their lives. I will not allow that negativity to bring me down, because every "mistake" I have made so far, has had a beautiful outcome.